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July 17, 2017

The Or

In the last week, I’ve photographed two newborn sessions. It isn’t the norm for me considering I primarily shoot weddings. However, close friends are welcoming the most precious humans into the world and I just can’t say no. I found myself in an interesting place with my thoughts this morning while editing some more photos from these two sessions…

When women see baby feet their mind’s go immediately to “i want one” or “no thanks”. It’s amazing to me the moments when the “or” is what is the loudest thought.

“Or”…. It holds a lot more than we give it credit for.

The “i want one” is something that I struggle to balance sometimes. I want one to snuggle and kiss. I want one so my daughter knows the love of a sibling. I want one that my husband will love just as fiercely as our first. Taking 5 pregnancy tests in one week because obviously they are broken isn’t something that I typically would admit. But here I am sharing it on a blog so that someone else out there doesn’t feel as crazy while they wait 2 minutes to hopefully see a line that wasn’t there yesterday.

The “no thanks” is something that I chant on the reg in hopes that I’ll believe it if I’m never gifted with another small human again in my house. No thanks, to the late nights. No thanks, for the dirty diapers. No thanks, for all the responsibility that comes with raising a human. Some days the “no thanks” really does seem like what I’d prefer for our family.

But then we have the “or” and honestly, it’s really what I’ve been striving to sit in the last few weeks and even months. If we do “OR” if we don’t…. it is well with my soul. God recently pointed out to me that I’ve been focusing SOOOO much on such a small part of my story. Not that it isn’t important but that I have blinders on. I’m pretty much missing the other parts of my life that He is at work in, weaving together for a bigger plan to bring Him glory.

I hope that no matter what you are going through right now in this very moment that you can take a few minutes right now and acknowledge that the “or” is where something great is brewing. It might be in the midst of transition with school, job, relationship or even heartache and grief. But friend, look up and see that something good is around.

I’ll leave you with adorable baby photos and a book recommendation – Through the Eyes of a Lion by Levi Lusko. It isn’t for the faint at heart. You will cry. But your perspective of others grief “OR” your own will change for the better. Trust me. Click HERE to buy your own copy.

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